Is Jesus Your Sidepiece?

The sidepiece.

We all know what that is, either because we’ve had one or we’ve been one at one time of our life. The sidepiece is man or woman in your life you keep around in addition to your main relationship. They’re the one that you hit up after the big fight you have with your “real” significant other. The one you go see when it’s convenient to you. The one you give just enough attention to, to keep them around, but not enough attention to create a serious relationship. The sidepiece is never your main priority, let alone your only priority. And to be honest, most people keep a sidepiece in their back pocket to fall back on just in case their main relationship doesn’t work out. The sidepiece always, and I mean always, gets the short end of the stick. Often times the sidepiece gives all their love and devotes so much of their time and energy to the cheater, who doesn’t do half as much for them. They spend time relentlessly pursuing and pining away for the one who doesn’t care enough about them to make them their main focus.

In short, it sucks to be the sidepiece!

Unfortunately, I know from personal experience. But as I look back over all my relationships, I have to confess that I’ve only had one sidepiece of my own and His name was Jesus.

Wait, what?! Yep, I said it. Jesus was my sidepiece.

The thing is that I’ve always loved Jesus (or so I said). It was just that I had to get some things together before I could fully commit myself to Him. I mean, I really wanted to be with Him, but I always gave the relationships I had with men take precedent over my relationship with Him. It was hard making Him my main priority when I focused so much on other relationships. I spent time with Him when I could. In between the phone calls that lasted for hours, the dates, and the time spent getting to know whoever my bae was at the time. I would squeeze in a prayer before I fell asleep or read the Bible occasionally. I spent just enough time with Him so that He would know I was still interested in Him, but not enough time to really form a strong bond with Him. However, whenever I got into a big fight or things didn’t work out with said bae, I would run to Him praying that He would fix things. If He didn’t, then and only then, would I pull Him out of my back pocket and fall back on Him. I would promise to commit myself to Him and really spend time with Him, only to push Him back to the side whenever my relationship was mended or a new relationship came along. I hate to say it, but my relationship with Christ was that of the typical cheater with their sidepiece.

The crazy thing is, though, no matter how many times I gave Jesus the short end of the stick when it came to our relationship, He never gave up on me. I’m sure He knew that my heart wasn’t fully invested in Him. He had to know that I was only using Him as a backup plan. Despite all of that, He gave me His unconditional love to me at the very times that I would barely pay attention to Him. On the days that I barely thought of Him because I was so wrapped up in a relationship, He was relentlessly pursuing me and pining away for me. Me. The one who didn’t care enough to make Him my main focus. The cheater. The sinner. He loved me, even when I made Him my sidepiece.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that I’m not the only one that has ever made Jesus their sidepiece. So many of us have. We’ve treated Him like an option rather than our main priority. We’ve brushed him to the side when relationships, or work, or other endeavors have become our first love instead of Him. We’ve run into His arms only to ask for help or to have something to fall back on when things didn’t work out with what we were pursuing. But yet and still, He still loved us and pursued us passionately and relentlessly. He has given His all to be with us, even when we cheated on Him with whatever our main focus was at the time.

Some of us have changed our ways and left the life of infidelity to commit ourselves fully to Him, but many of us still are treating Jesus like our sidepiece. Putting Him on the back burner. Spending time with Him only in the stolen moments we have away from whatever we’ve put before Him. Barely paying attention to the one that constantly and consistently gives His all to us. Forgetting that He should be our first love. But if you’ve made Him your sidepiece, it’s time to change. As Christians, we’re required to make Him our first love. Revelations 2:4-5 says, “But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first. Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first …”

That means that if we’ve somehow made Him our sidepiece instead of our first love, we have to change. We have to repent for giving Him the cold shoulder and then change our ways so that He becomes our main priority and focus again. And isn’t He worth it? He’s the one who loved so much that He gave up His life for you. He’s the one who loves you enough to sit at the right side of the Father constantly interceding on your behalf. No man or woman, no job, no other endeavor or pursuit can give you that type of love. So is Jesus your sidepiece or your first love? Does He hold the place in your life that He should? Do you make Him compete for a spot in your life or is He your main priority? If you’re not sure about how you would answer those questions or if you know good and well that Jesus is currently your sidepiece, it might be time to take some time and reprioritize the place that give Him in your life. He’s worth way more than being your sidepiece. It’s time to make Him your first love again.

Is It Really Dead?

Mark 5:21- 43 tells the story of Jesus waking up the daughter of a synagogue leader. Of all the miracles that Jesus performs, I find this one to be one of His most interesting ones. I mean Jesus comes to the house to find a girl that her father thinks is dead, only to see that she is sleeping. The miracle here isn’t that He raises her from the dead or heals her from some debilitating disease. The miracle is the fact that He realizes she is just sleeping and wakes her up. Doesn’t seem like much of a miracle, right? Couldn’t the father or any of the many people that were in the house crying and grieving over her have done that? As a matter of fact, why didn’t they do that?

When we look at verse 38 in this chapter, it says that there was confusion throughout the house when the little girl was thought to be dead. Confusion. The thing that is of the enemy. (1 Corinthians 14:33 tells us God is not a God of confusion, so that means confusion has to be a product of the enemy). Confusion. The thing that will make you think things are that really are not. See, the devil will have you in circumstances believing that something is over, done with and dead, when in actuality, it is still full of life. The miracle here was that Jesus could see past the confusion and see what was really going on.

The same thing applies to our life. Jesus is the only way to see through the confusion that life throws our way. When you feel confused and don’t know which way to go. When your circumstances seem bleak and past the point of no return. Stop listening to the confusion and start listening to Him. Stop getting confused by your circumstances and start looking to the One who can see past your circumstances. See, the author of confusion and lies will have you thinking something in your life is dead, when it’s really just sleeping. He will have you thinking something is dead and gone, when it’s really just gone into hibernation. Sometimes things in your life need to appear lifeless so they can rest and rejuvenate during a harsh season in your life. It has to lay low for a while in order to survive and come back during its proper season. Some things in your life will need to rest for a season so that they can consistently replenish themselves to sustain you throughout your life. If it was around all year long it would not survive. Think about a bear that hibernates each winter. It goes into a deep sleep, and almost death-like state each winter in order to survive the harsh temperatures and lack of food that normally sustains it. If it didn’t hibernate each winter, it would die because the season cannot sustain the bear if it’s functioning at full capacity. The same rule applies to certain things in your life. God knows when the seasons in your life change and He knows that if He doesn’t allow that thing to hibernate for a season, it will die. Every season cannot sustain every blessing. Some blessings that you receive are so great that God has to let it go into hibernation because the current season you are in cannot sustain it.

That’s also why it’s so important to consult Him in everything that we do. Let’s think about what would have happened if Jesus hadn’t have been there with the little girl. In the midst of all the confusion, the father and the crowd of grieving people would have kept on thinking she was dead. They would have wrapped her up in burial cloth and put her in a tomb. They would have buried that little girl alive. Essentially, they would have killed her because when she finally did wake up inside of her tomb, there would be no food or water there to sustain her and continue to give her life. In confusion and hopelessness, they would have killed what was alive, simply by thinking and saying she was dead.

Let that sink in for a minute.

She wasn’t dead, but because they already thought she was dead they would have killed her and caused her death. If this is not one of the best examples of how death and life lie in the power of the tongue, then I don’t know what is. When we speak on things in the midst of confusion and stop speaking life into every area of our lives, we kill our blessings and any possibility of our situation turning around. We literally bury our blessings alive. That’s not to say that some things in our lives don’t die and are only meant to last for a certain period of time, but until you get an autopsy report for God, don’t declare anything in your life to be dead. Keep speaking life into every situation, despite the current circumstances, and continue praying until the Lord gives the final say. Speak life into that child that is strung out on drugs. Speak life into that spouse who seems to have given up on your marriage. Speak life in your finances when money is low and bills are due. Speak life into yourself when you’re overworked, stressed out, and depressed. Keep speaking life into any and every thing that seems hopeless until you hear otherwise from God. Just like Jesus and the little girl, He can see what’s really going on despite the confusion and He has the final say. What you’re thinking might be dead but it really might just be sleeping.