Over the past few months I’ve been led to stop using profanity and cut way back on secular music. I’ve been growing a lot in my relationship with Christ lately, and have been making a lot of changes in my life. However, these changes in particular, although small, have been very difficult doing. There have been several times where I have caved in and listened to music that wasn’t appropriate or cursed while stuck in rush hour traffic. I’ve often told myself that it wasn’t a big deal that I was backsliding because I don’t have to do these things to win God’s love and approval. He loves me and takes me just as I am, which is more than true. However, every time I’ve slipped up, I’ve ended up finding myself going back to dropping the profanity and secular music again.
But tonight it hit me and I came to a better understanding about why doing these things were on my heart. A song from one of my favorite secular artists, Kevin Gates, came to mind. I told myself that I could look up his song online and listen to it, but before I could reach for my phone or laptop, I changed my mind. Then I thought, “God you know I love you because you know how much I love me some Kevin Gates.” Then it dawned on me. I haven’t been drawn to give up these things in order to win God’s favor or to avoid His wrath. I’ve been drawn to give up these things simply because I love Him and want to please Him. It’s like when I get married one day. I know the man that God sends to marry me will love me. He’ll love me if I never wear makeup or put on perfume. He’ll love me if I wear sweatpants and a t-shirt everyday. He’ll love me simply because I’m me and I won’t have to do anything to win that love or prove my beauty to him. However, because I love him, I’ll take the time to put on makeup and wear a nice fragrance. And as much as I love my sweatpants, I’ll put them away most days and wear something a little nicer. Not because I think doing those things will make him love me more than he already does or that he’ll up and leave me if I don’t, but because I know doing the little things like that will please him. Those small things will bring him delight and put a smile on his face, and because of that I don’t mind doing that.
True love completely changes and transforms you. It causes you to think and act differently. It causes you to do things you don’t have to do, but just want to do. Like I said, I’ve been making a lot of changes in my life because of my relationship with Christ. His love for me is changing me and transforming me daily. I’m starting to think more of Him and less of me. I don’t mind doing things (or not doing things) for Him, not because I want anything from Him, but simply because I love Him. The love He has for me, is making me want to love Him (and show Him how much I love Him) more and more.